Self-Control in Children:
"Being disciplined is more important that being smart. Being both is not just a little better-it’s exponentially better.”
This can be called self-regulation or executive function. “Just like the science of intelligence, the science of self-control has shifted in the last decade from the assumption that it’s a fixed trait – some have it, others don’t-to the assumption tit’s malleable. Its affected by everything from parenting styles to how recently you ate (the brain burns a lot of glucose when exercising self-control). The neural systems that govern control can get fatigued, and, according to one study, those with higher IQ suffer more from this kind of fatigue.” “Children appear to be highly attuned to the quality of their parent’s relationship." Children are “emotional Geiger-counters.” In one study, research found that children’s emotional well-being and security are more affected by the relationship between the parents than by the direct relationship between parent and child.” “…being exposed to constructive marital conflict can actually be good for children-if it doesn’t escalate, insults are avoided, and the dispute is resolved with affection. This improves their sense of security, over time, and increases their pro-social behavior at school as rated by teachers.” Resolution has to be sincere, not manipulated for their benefit-or they’ll see right through it.