9.30.2014

The Peace of Wild Things

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

— Wendell Berry


9.24.2014

How to Recover from Infidelity

Any degree of infidelity is always "something." It is never "nothing" or "not a big deal."
However, this does not mean tha a couple cannot recover...every couple can recover from a cheating incident...whether it is a virtual relationship, long term infidelity or a short-term sexual affair.

The steps to recover include:
Remorse (I am DEEPLY aware of  how my choices have impacted you...here's how I suspect you are affected...give specific examples.)
Responsibility (My cheating has NOTHING to do with you, your choices, our poor relationship, etc).
Repair (I'm willing to make amends and obtain the best relationship we both desire. I want to be a better partner).

Sometimes a couple can write down their feelings and the planned path to forgiveness. 
Workshops are helpful. Good self-help books as are weekend spiritual retreats.
Volunteering and giving of one's self helps a lot!
An experienced therapist can guide and cheerlead any couple to recovery.



Christina 760.522.5659

9.06.2014

Verify Your Therapist's License


I recently heard a troubling story from a woman who had been working with a "counselor" for about 3 months. As counseling was not progressing, this woman became curiouser and curiouser about her trusted professional. 
Upon further exploration, the woman discovered that, in fact, her counselor was not Licensed, even though her website indeed said "licensed." The counselor offered lots of testimonials of her successes on the website as well.
Please know that all Licensed Professionals can be verified online now.
If you choose to work with a counselor who is unlicensed, know that you are making a risky choice, as there are no official Boards over seeing your clinician. 
Licensed Therapists (MFT's, MSW's, LPCC's) are held to legal, civil, and ethical standards. Licensed Clinicians receive mandatory and on-going education. 
Licensure is not easily obtained. It is an investment of time and money - the gold standard of mental health, as it should, carrying with it not only expert education and training but also grave and moral responsibility.




9.02.2014

No, Go, Tell - Educate Your Child

No-Go-Tell 
rule

educate yourself and your children
at