To Praise or Not to Praise. Praise is important, but not hollow or unearned praise. It has to be based on authenticity – towards a specific effort or skill. When kids get to college, heavily praised students commonly drop out of classes rather than suffer a mediocre grade. “Image-maintenance” becomes most importance. They become afraid of not succeeding. ”Kids who are falling behind get drowned in praise. Carol Dweck, the master engineer behind the movement towards self-esteem, recently published an article disavowing her earlier work on self-esteem (largely responsible for doing away with competition and “ribbons for everyone”) showing that overly-praised children have an inflated sense of their own abilities. In fact, research concludes that having high self-esteem doesn’t improve grades, career achievement, or reduce alcohol abuse. The “continued appeal of self-esteem is largely tied to parents’ pride in their children’s achievements: it’s so strong that “when they praise their kids, it’s not that far from praising themselves.” All praise is not equal. Teens actually sense that criticism, not praise, really conveys a teachers’ positive belief in her student’s aptitude.